The unusual coach, lessons from a gardener

Deepanshu Sharma

This is the story of Bijoy, a gardener by profession and a life coach by attitude. But before I go any further, let me clarify that this is not a work of fiction. Rather, all characters in this story are real, including the name of the central character Bijoy and the two plants. However, I am taking the liberty of giving names to the two protagonists.

As the harsh Delhi winter was waning, my wife started planting saplings of various varieties of flowers, in time for them to blossom during spring. Among these were the Dahlia plants, which took roots and started growing tall and healthy. Bijoy, our gardener would come-by every other day to tend to them.

All was going well, till one day a neighbourhood cat ran across the garden, seriously damaging a fledgling plant. The tallest and sturdiest Dahlia. Let’s call it King Jr., the casualty of this rampage.

For those who are not as keenly interested in gardening, the Dahlia plant has a long stem, which grows straight up, sometimes up to 5 or 6 feet tall. However, it is also rather delicate, and a damaged stem means that the plant is unable to send sufficient nutrients to the leaves and flower buds. Looking at this, my wife, who is generally an optimist, also assumed that we have lost King Jr. But then, it was just a plant… you can get another one, right?

Enter Bijoy.

Without much worry and drama, he went about his job in a calm manner. He looked at King Jr. and checked out the broken stem. Thankfully, he wasn’t the type who gives up easily on his plants. He merely stuck a stick into the ground next to King Jr. and tied a thread to provide support so that King Jr. stays erect. I must admit, both my wife and I didn’t give this approach much hope, but then we didn’t want to interfere in the situation either. So, we let the expert try the ideas from his bag of tricks. While I quietly observed what he did, my wife found renewed optimism.

As these events were unfolding, the plant right next to this one started growing taller. Let’s call it Julius. Julius was taller and sturdier than all other plants, and of course taller than King Jr.

To our surprise, Bijoy stuck in a stick to support Julius as well. What was not so obvious at first became more clear over time, when Julius started becoming top-heavy and threw out several buds. We realised only later that Julius’ height and weight, plus the weight of the many flowers, would make it too heavy for it’s delicate stem to support itself.

Back to King Jr.

In a matter of few days, King Jr. started to regain it’s strength. The leaves got a new lease of life, and come spring-time, King Jr. started flowering. Almost as if it was resurrected.

Was this a miracle of nature or the result of nurture?

I’d say, it was the belief that Bijoy displayed, and the support he continued to provide, when needed, where needed. In case of King Jr. when the situation seemed hopeless. And in case of Julius, proactively, even as everything seemed to go just right.

It was a delight for my wife, and a profound life lesson for me. Taught by none other than Bijoy, who focused on just the potential of the plants, without giving up hope when things weren’t going right. These saplings were planted for a reason – because they make your garden look beautiful and make you feel cheerful. A temporary set-back does not change the capability or outcomes. Rather, the right support from a professional, who knows his or her job, can work around the situation and achieve the intended results.

Julius could have been crushed under the weight of whatever was making it look like a winner, but for Bijoy’s timely intervention. He made Julius more resilient, by plugging chinks in Julius’ armour.

Bijoy displayed qualities of a great coach by focusing on the potential, giving just the right amount of support without being visible; dipping into his knowledge, experience and intuition; above all, by not losing hope.

All said, I do have a nagging feeling that Bijoy gave pep-talks to King Jr. every time he came by. I know my wife did. Maybe they had a mutual trust which helped King Jr. deliver to his potential eventually.

The corporate world offers several situations where line managers and HR business partners loft star performers to the clouds, or dismiss the very same talent they once felicitated. Organisation proudly proclaims “we have a performance oriented culture where you are only as good as your last quarter“.

It’s only when you have a bad quarter or two that you need managers to elevate themselves to be coaches, and are not afraid to look inwards into their own ability to lead. Be focused on the potential of the talent, which was so carefully selected and groomed, whether it was by them or by some other very capable manager. WiIlling to provide support, when needed, where needed; even to those who seem to be going strong. Motivate those who need reassurance of their self-worth and demonstrate belief in their capabilities, especially when they are experiencing turbulent weather. And finally, deliver results in the long run, knowing fully well that every individual will go through ups and downs in their careers. This is what differentiates leaders from managers.

Got to learn a thing or two from Bijoy.

#coaching #optimism #leadership #learn #growth